Answering machines
Posted: October 10, 2011 Filed under: Funny 1 CommentTHESE ARE ACTUAL ANSWERING MACHINE MESSAGES RECORDED
1. My wife and I can’t come to the phone right now, but if you’ll
leave your name and number, we’ll get back to you as soon as we’re finished.
2. A is for academics, B is for beer. One of those reasons is why
we’re not here. So, leave a message.
3. Hi. This is John: If you are the phone company, I already sent
the money. If you are my parents, please send money. If you are
my financial aid institution, you didn’t lend me enough money. If you
are my friends, you owe me money. If you are a female, don’t worry, I
have plenty of money.
4. Hi. Now you say something.
5. Hi, I’m not home right now, but my answering machine is, so you
can talk to it instead. Wait for the beep.
6. Hello. I am David’s answering machine. What are you?
7. Hello! If you leave a message, I’ll call you soon. If you leave a
“sexy” message, I’ll call sooner!
8. Hi! John’s answering machine is broken. This is his
refrigerator. Please speak very slowly, and I’ll stick your message
to myself with one of these magnets.
9. Hello, you are talking to a machine. I am capable of receiving
messages. My owners do not need siding, windows or a hot tub, and
their carpets are clean. They give to charity through their office
and do not need their picture taken. If you’re still with me, leave
your name and number and they will get back to you.
10. This is not an answering machine – this is a telepathic
thought-recording device. After the tone, think about your
name, your number and your reason for calling, and I’ll think
about returning your call.
11. Hi. I’m probably home, I’m just avoiding someone I don’t like.
Leave me a message, and if I don’t call back, it’s you.
12. Hi, this is George. I’m sorry I can’t answer the phone right now.
Leave a message and then wait by your phone until I call you back.
13. If you are a burglar, then we’re probably at home cleaning our
weapons right now and can’t come to the phone. Otherwise, we probably
aren’t home and it’s safe to leave a message.
14. Please leave a message. However, you have the right to remain
silent. Everything you say will be recorded and will be used by us.
15. Hello, you’ve reached Jim and Sonya. We can’t pick up the phone
right now, because we’re doing something we really enjoy. Sonya likes
doing it up and down, and I like doing it left to right… real
slowly. So leave a message, and when we’re done brushing our teeth we’ll get back to
you.
Find your Birthday
Posted: October 9, 2011 Filed under: Maths Tricks Leave a comment
MATH is also MAGIC.
Try this trick for a change and u will be surprised.
It’s really interesting!
Take the day you were born (Date) x 4
+ 13
x 25
– 200
+ Month of your birth
x 2
– 40
x 50
+ Last 2 digits of the your birth(year)
– 10500
What did you notice?
Isn’t it magic?
Wirite on Sand or Stone?
Posted: October 9, 2011 Filed under: Philosophy Leave a commentTwo friends were walking through the desert.
During some point of the journey, they had an argument; and one friend slapped the other one in the face.
The one who got slapped was hurt, but without saying anything, wrote in the sand,
“Today my best friend slapped me in the face.”
They kept on walking, until they found an oasis, where they decided to take a bath. The one who had been slapped got stuck in the mire and started drowning, but the friend saved him.
After he recovered from the near drowning, he wrote on a stone:
“Today my best friend saved my life.”
The friend who had slapped and saved His best friend asked him,
‘After i hurt you, you wrote in the sand and now, you write on a stone, why?’
The friend replied
“When someone hurts us we should write it down in sand, where winds of forgiveness can erase it away.
But, when someone does something good for us, we must engrave it in stone where no wind can ever erase it.”
Learn to write your hurts in the sand and to carve your benefits in stone.
Abhishek R. Shah 